Adaptive vs Maladaptive Shame
Dr. Laura Markham explains how punishment leads to shame and how toxic shame leads to struggles with anxiety, depression and addictions: http://www.ahaparenting.com/blog/_punishment_shaming_children
The Perils of Perfectionism
A great article that talks about how perfectionism leads to unhappiness: http://www.ahaparenting.com/blog/my-name-is-laura-and-im-a-recovering-perfectionist